Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >

How can my husband adopt my daughter if her father will not give up his rights?

Asked Jun 12, 2009, 08:57 PM — 12 Answers
My daughter's Bio father and I split before I found out I was pregnant. While pregnant I met my now husband. He has been there for my daughter since the day she was born. Her Bio Father has seen her a total of 6 times (She is now 3 and he hasn't seen her in about 2 years). He pays court ordered child support and provides her with health insurance, but that is as far as it goes. He has never requested partial custody or even visitation. My husband would like to adopt her but her father will not give up his rights. He has the "what's mine is mine" thing going on, it is obvious that his reasons are not in the best interest of the child. Is there anything I can do to "force" him to give up his parental rights? If time and money were not an option is there ANYTHING that can be done?

I'm not sure if this matters, but when my daughter was 3 months old he threatened to kill me and take her. I went to court and got an order of protection which the judge continued for a year. When the year ended I did not renew it. Again, I am not sure if this matters, but thought it was worth mentioning.

Thanks!

Search this Thread
Share |
12 Answers
Synnen's Avatar
Synnen Posts: 7,882, Reputation: 12354
Expert
  
#2

Jun 13, 2009, 08:02 AM


Probably not.

There are laws in place to protect parental rights for a REASON.

How would you feel if YOUR parental rights could be severed by someone who wanted something different for your child than you did?
Helpful
Fr_Chuck's Avatar
Fr_Chuck Posts: 72,657, Reputation: 37036
Expert
  
#3

Jun 13, 2009, 11:14 AM


No, since he is paying child support there is no chance of you taking his rights away.

In fact even if he was not paying support and way behind, it is very possible that you should could not take his rights away.

And what is it hurting the child, the step father is still there for the child, adoption would not change the love and family he is providing
Helpful
mommy1980's Avatar
mommy1980 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
New Member
  
#4

Jun 14, 2009, 08:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Synnen View Post
Probably not.

There are laws in place to protect parental rights for a REASON.

How would you feel if YOUR parental rights could be severed by someone who wanted something different for your child than you did?
*** Is that REASON neglect? Yes, he pays child support because he has to, not because he has the child's best interest at heart. And your right, I would feel horrible if I was activly involved with the child and my rights were taken. That is clearly not the case here.

Although I do not agree, you are certainly entitled to your opinion. Thank you for taking the time to respond.
Helpful
Fr_Chuck's Avatar
Fr_Chuck Posts: 72,657, Reputation: 37036
Expert
  
#5

Jun 14, 2009, 08:07 PM


Sorry no, neglect "may" be used if he was not paying support, but many states have laws that even not visiting or not paying child support is not enough to take the fathers rights away.

So by his paying support he is not legally neglecting the child.

One would think< anyway that if he does not visit, does not want anything to do with the child, he would jump at the chance to get out of paying child support by signing over his rights for adoption. Has this been explained in detail to him that his payments stop when the child is adopted
Helpful
mommy1980's Avatar
mommy1980 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
New Member
  
#6

Jun 14, 2009, 08:09 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
No, since he is paying child support there is no chance of you taking his rights away.

In fact even if he was not paying support and way behind, it is very possible that you should could not take his rights away.

And what is it hurting the child, the step father is still there for the child, adoption would not change the love and family he is providing
*** You are absolutely right, it is not hurting my daughter. My husband will still love her the same. I guess all it will change is her name. The name issue is one of the main reasons I want the adoption. I am married and although I have my name hyphenated, she has a sister with a hyphenated name too. She is the only one that does not have my husbands name attached. I just feel that when she gets older she will feel left out.

Thank you for your response.
Helpful
mommy1980's Avatar
mommy1980 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
New Member
  
#7

Jun 14, 2009, 08:14 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
sorry no, neglect "may" be used if he was not paying support, but many states have laws that even not visiting or not paying child support is not enough to take the fathers rights away.

So by his paying support he is not legally neglecting the child.

One would think< anyway that if he does not visit, does not want anything to do with the child, he would jump at the chance to get out of paying child support by signing over his rights for adoption. Has this been explained in detail to him that his payments stop when the child is adopted
I understand that he is not legally neglecting her.... But in my eyes he is. She has NO physical contact with. And yes, one would think! He and his wife are FULLY aware that the child support payments will stop and she will no long be on their medical insurance. Like I had said before he has the "what's mine is mine" thing going on.
Helpful
Fr_Chuck's Avatar
Fr_Chuck Posts: 72,657, Reputation: 37036
Expert
  
#8

Jun 14, 2009, 08:16 PM
I know , my second wife, is divorcing the person she left me for now, she has asked to take back our old married name since our kids and grandkids all have that name.

If he will not sign for adoption, have you asked him to sign just to allow her name to be changed
Helpful
mommy1980's Avatar
mommy1980 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
New Member
  
#9

Jun 14, 2009, 08:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
I know , my second wife, is divorcing the person she left me for now, she has asked to take back our old married name since our kids and grandkids all have that name.

If he will not sign for adoption, have you asked him to sign just to allow her name to be changed
Is the name change an option without adoption? Honestly, one of the reasons I am pushing for the adoption is because my daughter is the only one that does not have my husbands name attached. If that is an option I can see if he will go for it. I am sure he won't, but it is worth asking!
Helpful
Fr_Chuck's Avatar
Fr_Chuck Posts: 72,657, Reputation: 37036
Expert
  
#10

Jun 14, 2009, 08:31 PM
Yes it is a option, the laws on this vary by state. And to be honest I am not up on the name change rules. It is a very simple procedure, but most places will require both bio parents but it is woth a check at your local court house on those rules. It is really a fill in the blank form, file it pay a fee and it is done.
In GA you could honestly change you name easier than get a drivers license
Helpful
Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions
 
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Check out some similar questions!

My husband wants to adopt my daughter her father not around! [ 6 Answers ]

My husband wants to adopt my daughter he has been with her ever since she was 13 months old and now almost 8 yrs old and her dad has'nt seen her since she was 12 months He pays child support only because it's court ordered but she don't know him and would probably be scared of him she don't know...

Can my husband adopt my daughter her biological father was never around [ 1 Answers ]

My husband has raise my daughter since she was days old we were married when she was about 4months his the only father in her life the biological father took off after he found out I was pregnant she has my last name and is starting school next year we both would really like her to had our last...

Father abandoned daughter one and a half years ago and step father wants to adopt [ 1 Answers ]

Hi, I have a question. My daughters father completely stopped contact with my daughter a year and a half ago. We were separated for eight years, Since then I have remarried and gone on with my life. He suddenly stopped all contact with her a year and a half ago, stopped child support about three...

Can my husband adopt my daughter since the biological father is deceased? [ 5 Answers ]

My daughter is 9 years old and her biological father just died July 30th. My husband has been in her life for 7 years and I would like him to offically adopt her now. Also, I get social security for her every month so will that stop if my husband adopts?

Can my husband adopt my daughter if her father is not around? [ 13 Answers ]

I live with my husband and I have my daughter,which is not his biologically,but I also have a son that is his,so I was wondering if it is that he could adopt her without the father's consent,keeping in mind that her father is nowhere to be found.

View more Adoption questions Search