I have just been informed that my 12 year old daughter is not my daughter. I've taken care of her financially and emotionally all her life. A little over a year ago her mother decided she (my daughter) no longer fit her lifestyle and abandoned her. She's lived with me ever since. I filed for custody in January of this year. I've been back and forth with the court system since. Since I never signed the birth certificate and paternity had never been established the courts ordered that my daughter and I have a DNA test done. Well the results in and based on the information I've received it's says biologically I'm 0% her father. I'm at a loss. I love my daughter very very much and despite what this piece of paper says I'm always going to be her father. However the reality of it all is, her mother is still M.I.A. I am scheduled to go to court this coming Wednesday for the evidence hearing. Am I going to lose my daughter? Will they allow me to adopt her?

GlindaofOz

I'm not sure what will happen at the hearing. It is a possibility they could grant you guardianship.

However, I must applaud you for what you are doing. So many men in this world run away from children they have made and come on here wanting to know how to get out of child support or how to cease contact with their children. It is beautiful what you are doing and I am so sorry that you found this out. That is one lucky little girl.

heartache3999

Thank you but my thoughts are God brought my daughter into my life 12 years ago for a purpose and no matter what I will see it through. My wife is teaching me the power of prayer and I'm learning. But I'm scared I don't want anything to happen to my daughter.

GlindaofOz

Have you contacted an attorney in regards to all of this? I cannot imagine they would think she would have better life away from the only father she's ever known. i really hope that you and your wife retain guardianship of your daughter.

heartache3999

We did. Immediately after we received the mail this afternoon. Unfortunately this leaves the weekend for many unanswered questions. Hoping to hear from them Monday.

ScottGem

Take a look at this thread:

http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family-...pa-118345.html

Especially the last note from Gv70. If you were married to the mother at the time of birth, then some states award you defacto paternity.

Fr_Chuck

Yes alot will depend on your state, there are some states you would have rights under but many where you would not. I wish more men would be like you, I hope for the best

GoldieMae

Grrrr your attorney for not checking voice mail on weekends, but that's neither here nor there.

In juvenile courts, the first rule, and the one on which all other rules are based, is that the court is an advocate for the child and must do what is in the best interest of the child. I presume there is a social worker connected to this case who has interviewed you and your daughter? Has your daughter informed the court and/or the social worker that she wants to remain with you? Have they visited your home to make sure you are offering her a suitable environment in which to grow? Have you raised her since birth? I know you say that she's only lived with you a year, what was your contact with her before the year began? Does she have biological grandparents that are living? Do you have any indication as to who her biological father may be? These are all issues that may impact your parental rights.

You will probably need to have your lawyer file an emergency petition for guardianship. I do not know all of the facts of this situation, but the court may choose to place her in foster care if the court honestly believes this is in her best interest. Some courts will do this, but others do not want to forcibly remove a child from a home in which she is comfortable and will grant the emergency petition.

Given that the school year is coming up, you'll need to show guardianship so she can go to school, get insurance, etc., so the court knows time is of the essence.

I wish I could offer more help, but the only answer I can honestly give is "it depends."

Michelle0410

I know you posted this a couple of days but when I read this I promise I completely understand!! I have metioned this before about my dad, only difference is that he knew I was not biologically his from day one. This is so confusing I will try to explain the best I can. Okay my bio egg donor met my "stepdad" when she was three months pregnant with me, she was in and out of trouble but my "stepdad" loved her, he married her, I was born than over the next four years they had my other two sisters. eventually he got fed up with her because she was going down hill and going MIA for several days at a time, my dad then went to court and ONLY BECAUSE my bio mom wouldn't leave it alone was it very difficult for him to obtain full custody of all three of us. My bio dad ahs never been in the picture but before I started first grade my "stepdad" got full custody of me and my sisters even though I was not biologically his. With the mother being gone, I am sure they will try to find her, but I have said this before it takes anyone to make a baby but it takes a fther to raise one and I am sure the courts will see that just as that. You night have a bit of a struggle but who cares, I am sure your daughter is well worth it. I think god for my DAD everyday. He is now a proud grandpa and never even thinks about me not being biologically his, that kinda a stuff doesn't matter these days! I hope the best for you, and I hope you let me know how it goes! =)

LearningAsIGo

I wish you all the best and hope for a good result. This little girl deserves a great dad like you.