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    leyda98's Avatar
    leyda98 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 6, 2008, 04:44 PM
    Is it normal not feel pleasure during sex?
    Hi, my name is laura, I do not feel pleasure or pain when having sex.the first time I had sex I was in seveare pain and no pleasure, but I thought it was normal, I was scared.. the second time I felt nothing as if my vigina was numb so I quit. A year passed by with me having no sex at all intill I met my new partner but I still don't feel anything, I don't know what to do?
    kpinkme's Avatar
    kpinkme Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Mar 6, 2008, 07:57 PM
    Go to your doctor
    charlotte234s's Avatar
    charlotte234s Posts: 1,903, Reputation: 143
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    #3

    Mar 7, 2008, 02:59 AM
    You may be suffering from a form of female sexual dysfunction. Perhaps there is an emotional root, maybe not, but you may want to visit your doctor or gynecologist and discuss the issue with him or her.
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #4

    Mar 7, 2008, 09:48 AM
    Are you mentally excited about sex?

    Can you get yourself off with self stimulation?
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
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    #5

    Mar 7, 2008, 06:16 PM
    Leyda,

    It is normal for a young inexperienced girl to have trouble finding pleasure in intercourse and other genital-focused sexual acts. Another problem is inexperienced lovers.

    Sex in practice has not met your expectations of how delightful sex is *supposed* to be. However, having good sex is not a natural happening... many females have been fed a lot of negative talk about being sexual, it takes time and trying to get over all your unconscious and conscious sexual messages from religion and parents rattling around in your head and stiffening you up regarding pleasure.

    Really the worst possible sexual partner for young women is a young man... a young man is much better suited to a 40 year old woman who can handle all the inexperience and enthusiasm he can throw at her.

    You may want to get a book about awakening your sexuality through body pleasuring exercises... also, read Anais Nin. :) Never forget, men will never know as much about how your body works as you.

    Best wishes in 2008,
    charlotte234s's Avatar
    charlotte234s Posts: 1,903, Reputation: 143
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    #6

    Mar 7, 2008, 06:25 PM
    It's true what Choux has said. Usually your partner if you are young and inexperienced is inexperienced as well. Also, if you are worried about being ashamed or about birth control or whatever during sex, you may not be as into it as you'd hoped. Also, you can look into different positions and things you can do that may help you. Personally, I enjoy some positions much more than others.
    blk_beauty's Avatar
    blk_beauty Posts: 25, Reputation: 3
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    #7

    Mar 9, 2008, 05:53 PM
    When I first started having sex(when I was younger) I kind of felt the same way. Now that I'm a grown women I realize I was young and inexperienced and most of the time I was just having it to please my boyfriend. Just because you have a new boyfriend don't mean you have to have sex with him, if your not ready to get into the whole sex thing don't. It's worth the wait!
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #8

    Mar 9, 2008, 07:21 PM
    Do you masturbate, play with sex toys etc.

    If the answer is no then I can understand why you arent' experiencing pleasure during sex. Don't be afraid to experiment with your own body, if you don't know where to find things how are you going to give your boyfriend directions? The poor boy is in the desert without a map and no means of getting one. Maybe try reading a few books as previously suggested. Learn about your body, become educated about what turns you on and what turns you off.

    Remember, always, always, always use protection, birth control pill and condom would be best. Safety first then feel free to enjoy. Trust me, you will figure it out.
    KalFour's Avatar
    KalFour Posts: 332, Reputation: 46
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    #9

    Mar 9, 2008, 07:45 PM
    Hi Leyda,
    Do you feel sexual arousal with other things? Is it only penetrative sex that doesn't thrill you. Remember that the majority of a woman's sensitive areas are not internal. For a lot of women, vaginal intercourse is the least pleasurable part of sex.
    How have you felt about your partners emotionally?

    Kal
    presley's Avatar
    presley Posts: 6, Reputation: -2
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    #10

    Mar 27, 2008, 12:15 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by leyda98
    hi, my name is laura, i do not feel pleasure or pain when having sex.the first time i had sex i was in seveare pain and no pleasure, but i thought it was normal, i was scared.. the second time i felt nothing as if my vigina was numb so i quit. a year passed by with me having no sex at all intill i met my new partner but i still dont feel anything, i dont know waht to do?
    Get into the sex act

    Do what YOU feel like doing and find something that goes for you
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #11

    Mar 27, 2008, 12:27 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by presley
    get into the sex act
    What the hell does this even mean??

    You sound like a 15 year old.

    Please note this forum is ADULT sexuality.

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...ality-u-b.html
    orgless's Avatar
    orgless Posts: 118, Reputation: 0
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    #12

    Mar 27, 2008, 01:50 PM
    Alll I can say is that I'm exactly the same as you, thing is though this rubbish about it getting better as you age etc etc and become more experienced has nothing to do with any of it, if you can't feel something then its simple you can't feel it, and no amount of conning yourself will make any difference, thing is for me, I don't fall for all this about pleasure etc etc I don't think it even exsists, so the likes of you and me, strive for something that isn't there and in the process just feel so disabled because we can't feel what ever the rest have fallen for
    Lo02's Avatar
    Lo02 Posts: 57, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Mar 29, 2008, 12:06 PM
    Girl I have the same problem. I have sex and its so boring because I don't feel anything. I have never had the famous orgasm and the sex isn't good at all. Its like a one way street because he gets all the pleasure.

    I wish you the best of luck on this because I'm going throug this too.
    If you need to talk message me.
    Maybe we can help each other out along the way.

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