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    rvagal0420's Avatar
    rvagal0420 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Mar 13, 2011, 10:17 AM
    Should I add my boyfriend to the deed and mortgage to my house?
    My boyfriend wants me to add his name to the deed to my house. The house has been in my name for 6 years and he helps me with projects needed around the house, but he feels like he is doing all this with nothing in return. If something were to happen to me, he wouldn't have a place to live. But if something happened to me, he would get the house and my 2 grown children would get nothing; whereas now (withouth his name on the house) they would benefit. We plan on getting married, but we have been "planning" that for a long time. We haven't because our relationship stays "on the rocks" most of the time. I'm considering adding him, but am concerned about the legal consequences I should be thinking of? What if I added him and it didn't work out? Could he kick me out of my own house? Would it be in my best interest to be married to him first? Is there a "legal" way to work this out and not get screwed?. for both of us? I don't want him to be homeless if something did happen to me. Would I have to put his name on the deed and the mortgage? Would I have to refinance? If we had to refinance, could we refinance with his VA loan or would we have to be married to do that?
    0rphan's Avatar
    0rphan Posts: 1,282, Reputation: 240
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    #2

    Mar 13, 2011, 11:00 AM
    If I'm being honest,you don't sound very secure in your relationship to even consider putting him on the deeds... your children have to come first,you need to seek some good advice from a solicitor/lawyer who is experienced in this field,they will tell you all the legalities.. fors/against.. of what you are suggesting.

    In my opinion do not take it upon yourself to go ahead with such an important decision,which if it went wrong could be a life changing.

    Seek legal advice do not be put under pressure by your boyfriend.
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
    current pert
     
    #3

    Mar 13, 2011, 11:53 AM
    You could consult a financial planner for less than a lawyer would cost. You could get some basic info from a real estate broker for free.
    I would say
    - don't get married just because of this
    - don't put him on the deed until/unless you have a clear idea of who paid what all this time, and who will pay what in the future, and what his work on the house is worth. Write it down together. It won't be easy to decide so don't nit pick too much. You could even draw your own contract and promissory note and have it notarized, and do this from time to time.
    - you can't just 'put' him on the mortgage without the bank writing a new mortgage. You don't have to be married, but you should check what the requirements are for a VA loan single vs. married, and the amount you can borrow.
    - the ability to force or not force a sale of a home by one person on a deed depends on how the deed is written. You need to know the laws of your state on this. If married, you need to know if you are a community property state or not in the event of divorce.
    - consider making him a less than half owner (see if your state allows it)
    - consider writing a will that leaves him a fraction, with your children. You can always change it.

    Since the relationship is rocky and you pay the mortgage, I would have a side contract and a will, no marriage, no deed change, no mortgage.
    ballengerb1's Avatar
    ballengerb1 Posts: 27,378, Reputation: 2280
    Home Repair & Remodeling Expert
     
    #4

    Mar 13, 2011, 12:12 PM

    You have nothintg to gain and everything to loose. The next time he says he does your mainatinence for no return ask him about the roof over his head. You owe more to your kids than to this man so think of them first.
    caseclosed's Avatar
    caseclosed Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Apr 6, 2012, 08:38 AM
    rvagal0420... I am encountering the same situation. Visit my post. Search for me "caseclosed"
    askmesomething's Avatar
    askmesomething Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #6

    Jun 30, 2012, 11:15 PM
    I added my boyfriend to a mortgage during a re-finance and to the deed during the same refinance and it was one of the very, very worst, stupid and naïve decisions I ever made. I was old enough and smarter enough to know better, but not nearly as informed enough. Don't do it. He "wants" ownership because he probably contributes in some way ( I hope by paying rent), but when you sell it, even if a year, you split the proceeds in HALF! So he lives there and pays for 1 year, you've lived there for say 7 years and bought, put downpayment, took on liability, etc, and he walks away with half?? NO WAY JOSE. Bad Bad Bad idea. And something tells me he is not great with money, so if it's a loss you face when you sell, guess who is going to wind up getting stuck with it? You. He'll walk. I suspect. Cheers.
    AK lawyer's Avatar
    AK lawyer Posts: 12,592, Reputation: 977
    Expert
     
    #7

    Jul 1, 2012, 05:12 AM
    This is a fairly old thread. The best advice is that "boyfriends" get nothing if their "girlfriends" die: provide for him in a will specifically tailored to your wishes.

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