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danas200 · Feb 1, 2012, 01:08 AM

I'm an 57 year old male who has had a 7 year relationship with a now 10 year old child. This was a father daugther relationship allowed by the child's mother. Due to an argument the mother has broken this relationship totally leaving me locked out no contact allowed.
What need to know at what age in Oregon would yhis child be allowed to contact me legally. How should I handle being called or even visited by this juvenile ?

ScottGem · Feb 1, 2012, 04:57 AM

18. Until the child reaches the age of majority they are under the control of the legal parents. Any attempt to go against the parent's wishes could get one in trouble with the law.

Also, please don't get me wrong, I'm not suggesting there was anything improper in your relationship, but if you go against the mother's wishes, she could claim there was. And while it might be hard to prove either way, the taint would be very serious for you.

I'm sorry this happened to you, but I would suggest that you join the big brother program if you feel you want to mentor a child.

cdad · Feb 1, 2012, 02:31 PM

What you can do is file for visitation. Just realize that it will create a hostile environment but you and the mother may be able to work through that if the relationship of the past was as you say it was.

Ref:
The statutes of Oregon providing for visitation rights are not limited to grandparents but include any person who has emotional ties with a child that have created a child-parent relationship or an "ongoing personal relationship." The statute defines a child-parent relationship as existing in whole or in part within the six months preceding the filing of a request for visitation.

Grandparents Rights in Oregon - Grandparents Rights by State

danas200 · Feb 2, 2012, 12:51 AM

What needs to happen in order to get a restraining order in Oregon? What types are there?

ScottGem · Feb 2, 2012, 04:36 AM

A restraining order is issued to protect someone from someone else. Usually you need to show you are in danger from or being harassed by the person..

danas200 · Feb 2, 2012, 06:45 AM

I've read a bit more on line I think it might end up being a stocking order rather, as means to keep me from seeing a child I helped raise. This would keep me from seeing or in any way contacting the child under that order. I've not done violence or that sort of thing I've just tried to write her one last time but was denied this opportunity. Haven't gotten one but feel its in the air of possibilities coming my way and wanted to know how it might happen. Looks like its pretty simple to get you just need two examples and I'm sure a letter would be one.

J_9 · Feb 2, 2012, 09:04 AM

For more information...

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family...ly-632305.html

{threads merged}

danas200 · Feb 2, 2012, 11:25 AM

I'm wondering if this (Oregon Grandparents Rights Visitation Based on Prior Relationship With Child) might apply in my situation. I've been the not related fill in father to a now 10 year old since she was 2 years old. This ended 2 years ago when her mother and I broke up, but the mother asked me to continue being the step father. This ended last month after an argument over the mother's ill treatment of the child's grandmother who does child care there. Hurtful things were exchange and this lead to her cutting off all contact with them immediately.
So I'm asking if visitation rights could be given to me in court for psychological reasons. Is this worth pursuing?

JudyKayTee · Feb 2, 2012, 11:41 AM

If you want contact with a child you love anything and everything is "worth pursuing."

Would I even attempt this without an Attorney? No.

I would also be prepared for a lot of mud slinging on the part of the mother - if she doesn't want you to have contact with the child she's going to say whatever it takes. Just a warning -

danas200 · Feb 2, 2012, 11:45 AM

Very good thank you much, I've just written to a family law attorney. Thank you for some hope.