I don't know about your late husband's pension. Pensions vary. Social Security does not:
"If your husband dies, you can get widow’s benefits if you are age 60 or older. If you are disabled, you can get widow’s benefits as early as age 50. Your benefit amount will depend on your age and on the amount your deceased husband was entitled to when he died. If he was receiving reduced benefits, your survivor benefit will be based on that amount.
If you are a widow with children, you may be eligible for a widow’s benefit at any age when you are caring for a child who is younger than 16 or disabled and entitled to benefits. As a widow, you also may be eligible for Medicare at age 65.
If you remarry before you reach age 60 (or age 50 if disabled), you cannot receive widow’s benefits as long as that marriage remains in effect. If you remarry after you reach age 60 (or age 50 if disabled), you will continue to receive benefits on your deceased husband’s Social Security record. However, if your current husband is a Social Security beneficiary, you should apply for a wife’s benefit on his record if it would be larger than your widow’s benefit. You cannot get both.
If you also are entitled to retirement benefits based on your own work, you have some other options. Ask a Social Security representative to explain the options, so you can decide which would be best for you." What Every Woman Should Know
EDIT: Here you say you are 45. Which is it, 54 or 45? http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/governm...on-431496.html