In the past, I had a girlfriend who cheated on me with a girl. It turned out she was bisexual, and didn't tell me until we broke up. This girl tended to be very close to other girls, but I never thought of it sexually.

My current girlfriend swears she's heterosexual, but for some reason I get insecure about it when she hangs out with her friends or stays the night at a friends house. She tends to be close to them like my last girlfriend, in that she likes to cuddle with her girl friends, and be close to them. She tells me that she would never let it go further than that, she would never kiss them or allow them to touch her, etc.

I know she's telling the truth. But I still feel insecure about it. I've talked to her about it, but I'm still insecure. What can I do?

I am glad that you acknowledge that this is your issue and not hers. You say that she has given you no reason to mistrust her, and that you know she is being truthful. What more do you need? You can't punish her for what her ex did. I would talk to her, and tell her what happened, and why that causes you to have the insecurities that you do. Make sure that you let her know that you are doing your best to work on your feelings on insecurity, and they they have nothing to do with her. Then, work on it. Seek counseling if necessary. Don't accuse her or make her feel uncomfortable for having friends. Think before you speak. The bottom line is, you are either going to let go of this, and enjoy your relationship, or you are going to hold on to it, and remain paranoid and suspicious. Your girlfriend doesn't deserve your suspicion and paranoia, and for your own emotional health, you need to work on it.

Being bi sexual, homosexual, gay, lesbian or anything between is not an excuse to cheat.

She could be bi, but if she is in a committed relationship she will not cheat. She could be perfectly "straight" and cheat every day if she wanted,

Cheating has nothing to do with your sexual orientation but has to do with moral values of a committed relationship

Fears and insecurities from past experiences have left you spooked. Now you see ghosts of those experiences.

It means you have not properly healed, or gotten over the past. Does she know of your past or how it has effected you?

Think before you act or speak, as many times as it takes to get control over your words and actions, or ruin this relationship.

I get that much, I just hope she isn't bi. Not because I don't agree with it. Just because... twice the competition, yknow?

I try not to make her uncomfortable, and I do think before I speak. But it often makes me feel bad, and I just don't know why. There's always that possibility looming in the distance.

Your past still haunts you. It shook your confidence.

That it does. Plus, I've never been known for my overflowing self confidence, heh.

Then take time to build it. Through accomplishment, and communications with your partner. Just because you fell for a cheater once, doesn't mean this partner will, or is.

Trust is the key to confidence. Starts with trusting yourself. Trust that you can deal with your reality.

Hmm, thank you. You speak wise words :)