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    mjp5802's Avatar
    mjp5802 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 24, 2006, 04:14 PM
    Why am I so sexual?
    Im a 20 year old college student. I was never really a sexual person. The thought of sex and having sex with random girls was never in my head. The first time I masterbated was in 8th grade, I only did it since "everyone else in my grade was". After that it was like I was addicted. I masterbated everyday if not more. Probably on average from about 8th grade to senior year I was doing it about once a day. After I lost my virginity and had sex with the same girl for a little over a year. Wed do it like 3 or 4 times a day sometimes at first. After a while we calmed down and did it about every day or every otherday. Probably about 7 months into the relationship I started masterbating because her pleasing me sexaully just wasn't enough. Now 2 years after I lost my virginity I found myself hooking up with 4 different girls this semester in 4 weeks... which some guys would be like good job. But the thing is that's not how I want to be. On days that I don't get laid I find myself masterbating every time my roomates out of the room. For the last year I've proabbly been masterbating about 3x a day. I produce a lot of *** when I masterbate each time also. But its kind of a problem because I like to talk about sex and stuff like that only, and that's all girls think I want. When I have sex with a condum on, it sucks so I just do the pull out and hope she don't get pregnant thing. One of the girls I was able to have sex with a condum on but that was because I actually liked her and she actually liked me. That's about the only time sex with a condum feels good to me, and well I just can't find a girl like that because I always find myself just trying to get down any girls pants when put in the position of should I go farther or not, I try to control myself the best I can, but still I end up doing it. The other day I had masterbated 5x. After masterbating one of my friends told me she wanted to come over and have some fun. She came over about 15 minutes after that and we jumped right into having sex. She told me she could kind of tell that I was having problems staying hard and stuff, but I was still able to have sex with her for about 20 minutes, and we both climaxed. It was fun, and felt good, but the next day I still masterbated another 3x. I really don't know what's wrong with me. Why am I so sexualy driven, and is their like some type of antiviagra I could take, so that I could find the right girl for me. Ive been single for 2 years, and really don't want to have multiple sex partners, I've always tried to wait for the right girl, but since march I believe I've slept with about 11 different girls, most of them being one night stands... I also ended up picking up chlymedia, and was able to not masterbate in that period because it caused pain, but I still found myself wanting to, and doing it on occasion regardless of the pain, just so I could feel the pleasure of getting off, which ended up being more painful because of the disease, I refused to let myself be put in a sitaution where I could spread the disease though, and that's when I really wished I could have gone farther because a girl I had my eye on was looking to have sum fun with me, and I ignored her all night because I knew how I am, and fater that she lost interest in me. And I didn't want to admit to anyone that I had the disease. Now I really don't care. But is their like something wrong with me, and what about in the future, am I just never going to want to have sex, because I pleased myself so much while I was younger?
    YeloDasy's Avatar
    YeloDasy Posts: 363, Reputation: 81
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    #2

    Sep 25, 2006, 11:38 AM
    I don't think masterbating a lot is a problem... but it sounds like it is effecting your life... and you are making decisions that are against yuour morals and you will go through pain to do it as well... that to me sounds like a problem. I would recommend going online and looking up groups for sexual addiction. I will do so also and let you know what I find...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Sep 25, 2006, 01:38 PM
    It sounds like you have way too much time on your hands (no pun intended). To break this cycle you need to do other things and change some of the females you hang around. Learn to leave the 'easy' ones alone and say no. Center your life around solid constructive activities and for your own good get a few hobbies. Anything that gets you out of the house and around healthy wholesome people would take some of that idle time off your hands. Anything that causes a problem in your life then seek help with and a counsellor or a trusted adult male friend to talk to would be a wise thing to pursue. I really don't know where sex addicts go but will try to find out.Get busy and good luck.
    mjp5802's Avatar
    mjp5802 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Sep 25, 2006, 02:05 PM
    Its not that I have that much free time, I spend a lot of time studying, but my roommate on the other hand spends his time studying in the library! I stayed up till 5 am last night with him so I wouldn't be alone in the room for a couple hours with nothing better to do then study and whatever. I really don't see why I am so addicted to sex. I honestly don't even like the sex I have with the girls I do it with. Its pleasing yes, but I like sex a lot more when its with someone I care about, maybe that could be part of the issue...
    Presleygall85's Avatar
    Presleygall85 Posts: 50, Reputation: 6
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    #5

    Sep 25, 2006, 02:20 PM
    I have had a few friends who have been addicted to masturbating, and it is an addiction... it is good that you are seeking help your past that really hard first step.. my best friend tried the whole 40 days and 40 nights he lasted 3 1/2 weeks and he kept trying until he got to the 40.. He is doing pretty good he only goes on himself like 1 time a week...
    My suggestion to you is:
    -Seek help/ find someone you can talk to
    -Limit yourself with no exceptions ( start slow like twice a day for 2 weeks then once a day for 2 weeks until you are going 2 weeks with out anything sexual.
    If you are afraid of losing your sexual drive then stop masturbating and casual date.. being with a girl does not mean you have to have sex! Remember that... And like Talaniman said change the girls you are hanging out with.. you never know what you can catch... and that goes with never ever do it with out a condom unless you are wanting to get her pregnant and if you trust her not to have AIDS or any other STD that is non curable.. you need to be careful there is a lot of non- curable STDS going around right now... Always were a condom always!
    mjp5802's Avatar
    mjp5802 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Sep 25, 2006, 05:35 PM
    I really don't think its masturbation in general, its more like sex in general, because sex is what I look for in general, at parties I find myself no longer talking to girls that aren't going to do anything, I've basically gotten to the point where I can tell if I'm going to get iwht a girl or not in the night, and if I'm not I kidna just go home and pass out, or trying to call a girl that I know will give me some and have her over! But after having sex I'm good for the night, I don't get why I'm so addicted to sex in general!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Sep 25, 2006, 08:57 PM
    Two ideas here-
    1. Professional help
    2. Condoms always
    mjp5802's Avatar
    mjp5802 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Sep 25, 2006, 09:29 PM
    I really don't think that I need to seek professional help. I think its just that I need to spend more time out of my room alone so when I get broed I'm not like well why not do that since I have nothing better to do. I tried that today and so far its been working out pretty good, and I haven't had sex on my mind really that much!
    Skell's Avatar
    Skell Posts: 1,863, Reputation: 514
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    #9

    Sep 25, 2006, 09:44 PM
    Well there is your answer. Find other things to do beside masturbate and look for sex.
    Go for a run. It may be built up energy that you could best use getting fit and improving yourself physically! Not just your forearm! Sorry.
    logicalbeing's Avatar
    logicalbeing Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Jul 2, 2011, 10:16 AM
    No one seems to be helping the issue. I don't know if I could help either, but I have some insights. You're still fairly young. You're in the years when your sex drive has peaked, so it's partially an expectation to have a high sex drive. Casual and meaningless sex isn't an expectation though. Maybe your issue is that you want intimacy so much that you forget the other important aspects of it, like friendship and sharing your intermost thoughts. When you find someone that you can share all of yourself with, not just the sexual aspect, you'll probably be cured. Even the most sexual people can find love and shatter that their urges with logic. You don't seem to have enough motivation though
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #11

    Jul 2, 2011, 01:49 PM

    This thread is from FIVE YEARS AGO!

    Please watch dates when responding.

    Thread closed.

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