We met about 3 months ago and it got serious very fast. He met my mom and sisters within a month and he took me to his daughters wedding and I met his family and friends. I was introduced as his girlfriend to everyone. Then a week later he said we need to slow down, he isn't sure if he is ready for a serious relationship. He said "we need to slow down, I think". What does this mean?

He text almost everyday and he calls me on the phone a couple of times a week. I don't know what to think. He is coming next week to my daughter's school play and then 2 weeks after that, he is coming to my graduation. He told me last night that he misses me.

I don't know what to think...

I don't think he know what to think either! He has asked to slow things down but hasn't actually been doing so, I think this has all scared him a little and he probably felt like you were feeling the same.

When someone asks to slow things down is mean meeting on the weekends or just meeting less, family gatherings would fall into a more serious relationship (in my opinion).

If you think slowing things down is the right thing to do also then lay off involving family memebers for now, no weddings, school plays etc. but it doesn't mean he likes you any less or vice versa, it just means you are both taking this serious and want to do it right. If you get into this too fast it usually ends all too fast.

What's your relationship background?

Had you just come out of previous relationships?

Me, I would ask him what he means by slowing down-you shouldn't have to wait around in limbo whilst someone makes their mind up.

Get some real answers!

He said he really cares about me, but just doesn't have the time right now to invest like he should in our relationship, but he text everyday and we talk a few times a week at night before we go to bed. He is constantly texting and telling me to get some rest and take good care of myself. If I need him for anything, let him know. That he misses me. Sometimes he calls at night and I won't pick up on purpose. He said he felt pressured from every angel. He said we got serious way too fast. I did ask him what did slowing down mean, did that mean he didn't want to date me anymore? He said "no, I think you are terrific woman and we are moving way too fast". I don't feel that there is another woman. I don't get that vibe. I just know all of this came out of the blue. He called me on a Saturday night and we talked for a long time, then went to bed and the next day the bomb hit.

He just got a new job, he is remodeling his house, his mom is very ill and he is having to go back and forth to the hospital to be with her, plus he has a horse ranch he is trying to take care and he is having financial problems as far as remodeling his house. So maybe it is just the pressure, but I'm confused and hoped someone out there could help with this. Maybe they've gone through this themselves or know someone who has.

He has had 2 bad marriages. His latest divorce was finally back in December. He says he doesn't want to make the same mistakes he has made in the past by jumping in too fast.

He will be turning 50 next month and I will be 39 in one week. It is hard to understand that someone at his age is behaving like this.

Relax, will you. He is just telling you not to be so emotionally invested, or involved because its only been 3 months. He is right, this is still the honeymoon period, and there is much left to learn about each other once the honeymoon is over.

I mean, the guy has already had two bad failed marriages, so is it realistic to think he would be in a hurry to do all that again? You may have gotten very attached and entwined in each others lives in the 3 months you have been together, but believe me, you are still strangers to each other.

In short, he is not as gung ho, or full steam ahead as you are and for sure he will stay at a safe emotional distance just in case things change, and no doubt he has seen things change, despite the words and feelings.

He is telling you don't get carried away by how great you think things are now, because he doesn't know how great things will be later. So protect yourself. That's the fairest warning you can get.

TOO MUCH, TOO FAST, CRASH AND BURN!