Oh cool, thanks. No I did do it only once to try and kill myself. I tied the rope thinking it would stay tied but it didn't!
I don't think like that at alll anymore, I just get really down when I have to deal with suicidal people at work. Also, issues with a violent boyfriend that I am just stuck in. I feel so guilty for dragging my family through all this again. I feel so embarrassed and ashamed and I will probably lose my family over it, but I still don't think like that