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    helpme19779311's Avatar
    helpme19779311 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 26, 2010, 02:15 AM
    My mother is a sociopath and has ruined my life with lies and deceit what do I do ?
    My mother is ruining my life she is lying and causing problems in my life she has lied on me so much everyone in the world hates me and doesn't trust me she has done everything in her power to destroy me and make my life miserable I feel like I a going insane she tells people I am ADD and mentally insane so no one will believe me how do you combat a liar when it is your own mother ? She is dangerous and my name is nation wide I am known all over the internet because of her and there is nothing I can do it seems like I feel like suicide is the only answer to escape her my husband cannot find a job because she has ruined his reputation it is a shame what is being done to us we cannot go anywhere or do anything without people repeating the lies she has told on me I feel like a prisoner in my own life because if her
    lana.'s Avatar
    lana. Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Nov 26, 2010, 06:59 PM
    Hi,
    I have a friend who has a problem a lot like yours and I have helpd her through it for the past few years. I think that maybe your mother is trying to cover up her own mistakes by making you look like the bad one to make her self look better. One thing I do know for sure is suicide is not the answer!
    crazied's Avatar
    crazied Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jan 9, 2011, 01:57 AM
    My mother did very similar stuff to me, she stabbed me in the head with a fork once it took two hands to pull it out. She also used to bash my beautiful warm kind father and leave blood through the house. She was the organiser for the neighbourhood watch. She has got my brother who sexually abused me for many years who works at a girls school who has slept with at least one student that I saw but have been led to believe there are others. To bad mouth me my whole life, they made me look so bad that when he married a professors daughter who worked at the same school,the ***** mother started an argument betwqeen me and him, the professor rang the police and said all sorts of things like I had chemicals and was going to use it on them. etc. all this from one psycho *****. Completely freaked the poor cops right out. Now I am followed every time I go into town and am hated by them and my community. Thanks mum.
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #4

    Jan 9, 2011, 02:58 AM

    Has your mother been diagnosed as a sociopath?

    Perhaps there is more going on that you are aware of?

    Are you and your husband living in the same house as her? Can you two move out?

    Putting some distance between you and your mother may help the situation,I'm going to assume you are an adult since you state your married,and in saying that she is not responsible for you,you are free to make your own decisions and lead your life without interference from her.

    Instead of choosing to allow her to upset you,choose a different route,only you can change how her actions effect you emotionally.

    If your having thoughts of harming yourself consult your doctor for further advice.
    scarlet_pearl's Avatar
    scarlet_pearl Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Feb 16, 2011, 01:52 PM
    Going through, similar issues myself with the same person. Just want to be left alone... but it seems that she's trying to drive me insane/suicide... with the calculating & poisonous strategies to build Hate campaign against me.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #6

    Feb 16, 2011, 02:04 PM

    You give yourself way too much credit for being that famous.

    Next actually if people know your mom, they would know she lies, if she lies all the time, thus, it should not be an issue.

    You solve it, ( if old enough) just stop any contact with her and live your own life with no contact
    david word's Avatar
    david word Posts: 1, Reputation: 2
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    #7

    Jul 10, 2011, 02:55 PM
    I do not live mom and when I ask her I can come over she says she is at work and she is not she is at the bar and I call my dad and he is there to and I ask him if she is there and she is I only see my mom once a year
    And don't trust her
    ddkordic's Avatar
    ddkordic Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Oct 10, 2011, 07:53 AM
    Hi, I know how you feel, my mother is a sociopath too. She lies all the time, but I run away from her and have a daughter of my own. I love my little girl and I will be the best loving mother to her, she is now 1,5 years old, beautiful child. I have suffered my family karma, but I was given an opportunity to correct it now. I still haven't forgiven my mother, my psychotherapist thinks I should for my own good. I would like to find ways to hurt her, but the problem is that sociopaths don't have any feelings, so the best way is NO CONTACT.
    All the love to you all, and don't forget - you are not alone, many people have to deal with these cruel sociopaths.
    Daniella
    lollie67's Avatar
    lollie67 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Oct 16, 2013, 06:47 PM
    My mother is a sociopath too, it has taken my whole life to find this out. I am 46 and she has ruined my relationship between my older sister and I. I never knew the things my mother was doing to me behind my back, although many things she did straight up to me were in my face, I was always confused as to how she could be so cold and cruel to me, I never knew why my sister would always have bouts of anger towards me. I finally caught my mom lying to my sister about things she would say I did or said about her, so my sister would be mean to me in a false sense of thinking she somehow was protecting my mom from me, but I am a nice person, I am an animal lover, I am a good hearted empathic human being and I don't do mean or bad things to people EVER! And for my sister to believe that makes me crazy tooo its like Hello its me, I'm not like that and you know that. Its like my sister looks at me like I act this way around her and the minute she turns her back I'm mean to my mom! REALLY! No, that's what my mom does. They have a sick relationship and keep each others secrets so my mom can lie and count on my sister to believe her and not tell my why she mad at me AGAIN! it has caused me emmense pain, confusion and torture. My mother would do things like put my dog to sleep when I was not home and then break the news to me so matter of fact without compassion the whole while intensely staring at me to watch the pain take over my face. It made her happy to take me from happy to sad! She got rid of my rabbits when I was a child at church and again when telling me coldly, intensely watched for the pain to cover my face. Anytime I was happy about something and try to share with her, she would tare me down and enjoy every second of it, until I would leave so drained and miserable. Soooo sick! My whole life she did things like this to me and it would always leave me confused, but she my mom so I forgave and would just go on like nothing. Two years ago when I caught her in a major lie that she told my sister I had done (which I hadnt) my sister and I were fractured and on the brink of shattered and my mom made sure she pushed us to it! So I called my mom out when I found out what she had said, I was furious, It only infuriated her that I dare call her out because as she always did when caught, she needs to redirect the issue away from her so all she would say and with intense anger "I AM THE MOTHER" as if that made it OK to with your kids heads! It was the last time she would ever have a chance to say that to me! I had, had it and I now FINALLY see her for who she really is, I turned around and I said to her "I AM A MOTHER TOO, AND I WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO MY SON" and I walked out. Things got even worse between my sister and I after that and although I never know all my mom does to cause that, I know because I confronted her and commented on my being a mother as well, she diobolicly went into overtime to make my sister think I had done something horrible to her! That's how they work, they convince others you're the lyer, the crazy one, the ! I have since cut them both my sister and my mom out of my life so to stop the insanity and the forever on going pain and torment. I miss my sister at times, and I realize she just does not know she is being manipulated and lied to by her mother, my mothers quest to hurt me has hurt my sister too because she believes the lies! She would never want to hear the truth about her mother either, so I leave it be and hope some day she will see it, seems everyone else does but her. My adult life had been consumed with running the gammit of trying to figure out my moms crazy head! I would think my mom is, sick, then I would think maybe she crazy, then I got to I think she is just plain evil, but it never really felt 100% right. One day a friend of mine whom is a psychologist told me to look up sociopath. When I did... wow... it was my ah ha moment. That was it she is a sociopath TEXT book sociopath! It gave me a sense of relief finally finding the right answer to her cold, sinister behaviour. She is a pathelogical lyer thriving on drama, she is narcissistic she does nothing that's not to her benefit, she is anti social has no friends and just a horrible woman. There is no cure for sociopathy, the only remedy is RUN! Cut them out, be done with them! It may be hard if it a family member because we are conditioned to believe you don't cut your family out especially a parent, I thought that way while enduring cruelty, but that's not true if they only cause you pain, that is not FAMILY! It has given me back my sanity and the permission to guiltlessly be done with her! She is dead to me. Im sure her life is so boring not having me to target anymore because they need to target someone and its typically the one with the most feelings. So if your loved one fits the mold of a sociopath which by the way is only 2% of the population. Know this, they won't change, they can't change because they can't acknowledge what they have done is wrong, they won't stop and you will always be their target as long as you put yourself in their path! So run hard run fast and don't look back. Good luck to all those who have suffered at the hands of these people! Live happy live large... I finally
    Am :)
    cat9467's Avatar
    cat9467 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Dec 3, 2013, 07:57 AM
    This is for Lollie67 - I have just read your post above and I there are so many similarities between my situation and yours I felt I had to write. I too, am 46 and am the daughter of a sociopathic mother. I am an only child, with no cousins either, so suffered all my childhood at the hands of this woman who would tell my father I had been bad and beat me and abuse me. No love, no cuddles only rejection and ridicule. However not knowing any different and not knowing what a sociopath was I endured this behaviour. I was always, always hoping she would tell me that she loved me & was proud of me (for anything), but it never happened. Thanks to a loving grand mother who took care of me I had a career, married & now have two beautiful daughters and a wonderful husband who has finally helped me break free from my mother. When he realised what I had been suffering for years my husband stood up to her and said no more. The effect was she went berserk at losing control and being exposed. She trashed our name in my home town and with her neighbours, my boss, phoned us repeatedly with abusive threats (all behind my father's back, of course) phoned my husband's large family telling lies about us, sent abusive letters and sadly cut off all contact with her granddaughters whom she allegedly 'adored'. We have not spoken for almost four years and while I miss my father and the fact my children have no grandparents (my husband's parents are dead) and I have no other living blood relatives apart from my parents, I could not imagine having contact with her again. Christmas is hard especially when the advertising world portray loving grandparents coming to share in the family joy, but that never happened for me and I know she can't change and won't change. I have cut short this story as a lot of her abuse is too painful to relate. She is an alcoholic & prescription drug addict as well, a combination that made my childhood hell, never knowing what mood she would be in and how best to please her. The only way to escape a sociopath is to cut off all contact. Like Lollie67 I too, think my mother's life must now be boring that the naïve sucker (me) has gone from it. Once I was free, I began to analyse situations in my past and realised where I had been conned and manipulated. I felt such a fool and very bitter and angry towards her for her deceit. I had believed her. She was my Mum, why would she lie? And then I felt very sad and hurt. Many things she did had caused me great emotional pain and she had known and did not care. I had three months counselling last year to deal with this situation and it was such a relief to hear a stranger (counsellor) say it wasn't my fault, I was not to blame. Good luck Lollie67 and anyone else in a similar situation. You must break free from the sociopath, it's the only way out.

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