ADTHERN:
There might be a lot of "real" issues that are causing my stress about this. I don't know if you saw the one thing I posted but I'm just going to say it again... I think I'm relating his masturbation to the fact that he TOTALLY shut me out when he was doing it faithfully. I feel like that is the reason I get no imtimacy from him, even just holding me after a long day, I guess it would feel good for me to know someone appreciates what I do for my family, maybe just give me a good hug.

About the night to myself you are totally right I do need that but he won't give it to me. I shouldn't have to get a sitter when he is capable of doing it. He's has gone out like 5 or 6 times since the baby was born and usually he doesn't answer his phone and drinks all night. This causes anxiety and jealousy.

The other thing when you said 5 minutes instead of whatever time it takes for us. To be honest he doesn't take long to go sometimes he does but rarely. A lot of times I would have sex just to get him. Like I said I love to turn him on I like to be involved most of the time just for him, maybe that's why I feel so unappreciated cause I always tried to do what he wanted and all of a sudden he just stopped wanting it.

EVERYONE:
I don't know, I gues the next help I need is How can I approach him without him getting so upset. Last night I tried to talk to him using the advice I got here and he still got pissed off. He just refuses to talk about anything that might have to do with this whole situation. Even if I don't bring up mastrubation he knows that's what its coming down to and tells me he doesn't want to talk about it.