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    rushabh20's Avatar
    rushabh20 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Aug 9, 2010, 12:24 AM
    I doubt my girlfriend even if she loves me a lot... what to do ?
    I'm in relation with my girlfriend since last 3 moths she is very caring she loves me a lot, but I am being so possessive , I always worried about if she would leave me, I doubt on her , even if she keeps telling me that she is never going to leave me , her whole family knowing about our relation including her friends except her father , she is very serious about her career and study , when she goes to college or whenever she study she would not call me , I know that's good but I thought that she is talking with another guy... I always worried about our relation, I am such a sensitive guy, please help me...
    lickemlolly's Avatar
    lickemlolly Posts: 397, Reputation: 62
    Full Member
     
    #2

    Aug 9, 2010, 03:58 AM
    Man you really have got to relax... nothing you have said here sounds out of the norm.. of course she can't possibly study and talk to you at the same time... she may be dealing with your insecurities now because the relationship is new but you are going to push her away in time and she is going to get fed up with the nonsense.. which is exactly what this is.. nonsense... stop looking for a reason not to trust her.. she hasn't given you one!
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #3

    Aug 9, 2010, 07:05 AM

    Sounds like you're the one with the issue. You need to work on your self-esteem and confidence.

    Has she done anything to make you doubt her? Have you gone through something in the past that made you have trouble trusting people? Find the root of your problem so that you can work on it.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    Aug 9, 2010, 01:25 PM

    This is not her problem, but yours, and if you make it her problem, with impulsive, insecure behavior, you will destroy whatever feeling she has, so think long and hard, before you act, or speak and keep telling yourself that you are just afraid, and getting carried away with your own feelings.
    positiveparent's Avatar
    positiveparent Posts: 1,136, Reputation: 291
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    #5

    Aug 10, 2010, 02:48 AM

    You'll drive her away if you don't take it easy, she's entitled to a life beyond you and so are you try telling yourself Im imagining it all Im just feeling paranoid.

    Were fine she's fine Im fine, no problems, so don't make them.
    Devorameira's Avatar
    Devorameira Posts: 2,461, Reputation: 981
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Aug 10, 2010, 05:30 AM

    Your behavior is unreasonable. Have you gone through a prior relationship that was bad or have you had the insecurity issues all your life? Have you considered counseling to get to the bottom of it?

    Sadly, what you are doing to prevent her from leaving you will likely make her do just that... you are definitely running her off. With all your insecurities, I doubt very much that she would ever sign on for a lifetime of being distrusted like this.
    slapshot_oi's Avatar
    slapshot_oi Posts: 1,537, Reputation: 589
    Ultra Member
     
    #7

    Aug 10, 2010, 05:51 AM

    Am I right to assume when she's not around you remain idle? In other words you're completely lost and bored when alone.

    Going with that assumption, you need to find something challenging and constructive to occupy your time so you can stop thinking pessimistic thoughts. If you don't have any passions, now is the time to discover them.
    rushabh20's Avatar
    rushabh20 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #8

    Aug 11, 2010, 08:39 PM

    Done is done man now I can't do anything what I've done... now what ? She is talking nicely with me.. I am also... now what should I keep in mind forever? I really love her very much.. she cares for me.. what should I do so that I would not turn her off with my possesiveness... and thank you all for replyng...
    rushabh20's Avatar
    rushabh20 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #9

    Aug 11, 2010, 09:37 PM

    Give me the sunshine... how to trust?. I always feel insecurity that what if she would leave me? If she will find anyone who is more handsome or more good than me?. I feel very sad whenever I think about these all... I know that she is very trusting she trusts me very much.. but I always back stabbed in my past... so I can't trust even if things are fine and going fine... please help me... teach me trusting my girlfriend I love her very much... I mean it... please don't interprete me wrong way... I am just hurted person... by my family... and also by my friends... give me positeve response...
    kapilkumar's Avatar
    kapilkumar Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #10

    Apr 25, 2011, 09:02 AM
    Dude I can understand totally what you are going through.. But trust quality is not sumtin that you can learn by sombdy's counselling.. its an inner quality you need to develop.. if she leaves you for sum1 den der is nutin you can do.. in fact der is nutin you should do.. but if she wants to stay with you and she loves u (assuming depending on your post) den you should trust her.. now simply stop being suspicious and start relaxin seriously as long as you are together and in future if you find ne concerte proof that she has cheated on you den leave her.. I'm telin you this habit of ur's is mind ****ing.. it will take everything good happnd to you in your life.. and not only now you will be lik this forever.. its high time you relax and stop thinking about ways she can cheat you and start enjoying tim you spend with her.. hurry dude.. u seem to be a nice guy.. be nice.. and stop being selfish and start being happy for others.. have a big heart..
    vijay143's Avatar
    vijay143 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #11

    Oct 27, 2011, 08:25 AM
    I can confirm that your relationship is going in a correct path, because minor problems and misunderstandings will lead to a strong relationship. The problem is not only for you but for 90% of the lads in the beginning of their relationship. I know you can't stop thinking bad her immediately. But remember one thing if you express the same feelings in front of her then she will definitely run away from you. But you can do one thing that when ever you feel the same then just close your eyes and say yourself that "misunderstanding leads to strong relationship". When you come out the situation completely and you both are connected well together then share these feelings with her at that time then you both will have fun. I wish you all the best for your great future with her till life ends. Go ahead.
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
    Ultra Member
     
    #12

    Oct 27, 2011, 03:57 PM
    Stop worrying about when something ends, enjoy while it lasts. Don't focus so much on how the break up or you losing her would be, because you have her and you should be focusing on how to enjoy you being in the position you are in now. If not, you will have problems the rest of your life.
    ashmitchhabra1's Avatar
    ashmitchhabra1 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #13

    Mar 21, 2013, 08:25 AM
    Well... dude blv it or not but m also going through same..
    But the difference is that my r.shp is 3 yrs old.. I doubt if she going to have sex with sum1 else..
    M not telling you not to doubt..
    Dout.. its very good thing to do..
    U must doubt till doubt itself comes to you and tell you that you don't need me now..
    But you have to understand 1 thing.. if you will behave like this forever then she will leave you because of your this behaviour.. then what you going to do.
    So let it be.. she have her own rights.. whatever she want to do let her do.. u also enjoy... have fun.. u also hang out with another girls don't u..?. if you don't then start doing it.. it will make you feel relax.. ;)

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