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    13sldr's Avatar
    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #1

    Jul 4, 2010, 01:48 PM
    Ever feel like you were meant to be alone
    I feel like God wants me to be single for the rest of my life.

    I have tried the whole internet dating thing, complete waste of time, all the girls on there are extremely pick and what not. I am shy. I don't really approach women and Im fine with that cause most of the time it back fires. I am kind of talking to a female right now, but I kind of have the feeling she isn't into me like I am into her, if that makes any sense. I have also been in two serious relationships, both went to dumps. And I don't know, I just feel like I am meant to be single and just focuse on my career and being the best at what I do

    Oh and by the way, Happy 4th
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #2

    Jul 4, 2010, 02:12 PM

    When you least expect love to find you sometimes it does. Dating sites... I'm not to keen on those for anyone. You seem to have accepted the fact that you are meant to be alone.

    Don't give up and don't settle for second best. Being alone isn't so bad if you haven't found the right one.

    Don't put yourself down or think any less of yourself. I believe we all have our match. I have mine.
    Be good to yourself by dating nice girls and don't do the club scene. I wish you luck and Happy Fourth to you also. You will find your match.;)
    positiveparent's Avatar
    positiveparent Posts: 1,136, Reputation: 291
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    #3

    Jul 4, 2010, 03:30 PM

    Sorry Kat I have to spread the rep.

    I agree with the advice kat has given you, don't put yourself down and love will find you when its your time, you just have to be patient and it really will come to you.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #4

    Jul 4, 2010, 03:38 PM

    First dating is a lot about attitude, as I have mentioned many times, first what type of girl are you trying to date, if all of them have to look like movie stars, yes, they will have 100's of guys chasing them all the time, does not mean you can't get a movie star type, but first just date.

    An example, after I lost my last wife, I was in my late 40's and perhaps 50 lbs over weight, I have a limp and appear to be blind in one eye. Not a winner on looks, but guess what a friend of mine told me that dating was like any sales job, except you are the product, and it is a matter of numbers, the more people you ask out, the more dates you will have.
    Some dates will go great, and some will be a thing you laugh about in a few years.

    Online dating works great, you will get dozens of first dates and some will go to second and some will go on and on if you click. The idea of online meeting is not to fall in love online, it is merely to meet and then meet in person for real dating. So no long distance online, merely meet local people on line.
    Next there are plenty of people you meet every day that may be great first dates,
    13sldr's Avatar
    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #5

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:01 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Kitkat22 View Post
    When you least expect love to find you sometimes it does. Dating sites ...I'm not to keen on those for anyone. You seem to have accepted the fact that you are meant to be alone.

    Don't give up and don't settle for second best. Being alone isn't so bad if you haven't found the right one.

    Don't put yourself down or think any less of yourself. I believe we all have our match. I have mine.
    Be good to yourself by dating nice girls and don't do the club scene. I wish you luck and Happy Fourth to you also. You will find your match.;)

    You are right on everyone has a match, a soulmate. But what if mine is my country. Everything to this point in my life is pointing towards that. i.e. like is said I am talking to this girl, have known her for about a week now, meet her on a dating site. First one I have meet. Everything was cool. We saw each other twice and had a great time (well at least I did.) And now over the past couple of days she has been acting a little different from how she was earlier this week, and what I mean by that is, last time I saw her, she couldn't wait for me to go over to her house, and when I did, she didn't want me to leave. And now its like she doesn't want to see me at all. We kind of had plans to see each other today, and spend the 4th together. We talked a little about it this morning, she said she wasn't feeling good and would have to see how she felt later. Nothing. I can't even keep a converstaion going with her now.

    Maybe I am suppost to be single for my whole life. And besides, if I do happen to find a girl that I like, and she fits everything I want (not just physical asspects but emotional and mental). What if she can't handle what I am looking for out of a relationship. There are things in a relationship that I want and I will not change, like no pre-marital sex, we have to date at least for 4years and things like that.

    But I don't know, if this is the case, I am basically giving up one goal to achieve another...
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #6

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:07 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 13sldr View Post
    You are right on everyone has a match, a soulmate. But what if mine is my country. everything to this point in my life is pointing towards that. i.e. like is said I am talking to this girl, have known her for about a week now, meet her on a dating site. first one I have meet. everything was cool. we saw eachother twice and had a great time (well atleast I did.) And now over the past couple of days she has been acting a little different from how she was earlier this week, and what I mean by that is, last time I saw her, she couldnt wait for me to go over to her house, and when I did, she didnt want me to leave. And now its like she doesnt want to see me at all. We kind of had plans to see eachother today, and spend the 4th together. We talked alittle about it this morning, she said she wasnt feeling good and would have to see how she felt later. Nothing. I can't even keep a converstaion going with her now.

    Maybe I am suppost to be single for my whole life. and besides, if I do happen to find a girl that I like, and she fits everthing I want (not just physical asspects but emotional and mental). what if she can't handle what I am looking for out of a relationship. there are things in a relationship that I want and I will not change, like no pre-marital sex, we have to date atleast for 4years and things like that.

    but I dont know, if this is the case, I am basicly giving up one goal to achive another....



    This girl your seeing may just be feeling bad. There are days I know I want to be alone and my husband says the same thing. We've been married a long time. There will be someone and when you do meet her it will be worth the wait. Keep asking God to lead you to the right person and he will in his own time. Don't give up hope... Bless you:)
    13sldr's Avatar
    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #7

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:11 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Kitkat22 View Post
    This girl your seeing may just be feeling bad. There are days i know I want to be alone and my husband says the same thing. We've been married a long time. There will be someone and when you do meet her it will be worth the wait. Keep asking God to lead you to the right person and he will in his own time. Don't give up hope....Bless you:)
    I understand she could be not feeling so good today, but at the same time, it would be nice to know if we are going to see each other at all during this weekend and what not. You know, at least not leave me in the dark and trying to figure out what's going on like I am now
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    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #8

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:15 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 13sldr View Post
    I understand she could be not feeling so good today, but at the same time, it would be nice to know if we are going to see eachother at all during this weekend and what not. you know, atleast not leave me in the dark and trying to figure out whats going on like I am now
    Just ask her. Honesty is the best policy. Are you a soldier? From the picture of yourself, I don't think you have anything to worry about. You're handsome and all you need is to have confidence in yourself.:)
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #9

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:15 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 13sldr View Post
    You are right on everyone has a match, a soulmate. But what if mine is my country. everything to this point in my life is pointing towards that.
    Whoa! How old are you? 23? 24? You're throwing the baby out with the bathwater. My younger son is looking and dating and checking out situations. No luck yet. He's 35. Now there's a woman at his church who might be the one. We'll see. He's willing to wait and do it right. When he finds love, it will be good. He won't marry just anyone and won't settle just to get married.

    You'll find her of these days.
    13sldr's Avatar
    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #10

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:26 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Kitkat22 View Post
    Just ask her. Honesty is the best policy. Are you a soldier? From the picture of yourself, I don't think you have anything to worry about. You're handsome and all you need is to have confidence in your self.:)
    I am in the Air Force.
    And I would ask her what's up but at the same time I don't want to sound clingy (sp) or push or anything like that
    13sldr's Avatar
    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #11

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:27 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    Whoa! How old are you? 23? 24? You're throwing the baby out with the bathwater. My younger son is looking and dating and checking out situations. No luck yet. He's 35. Now there's a woman at his church who might be the one. We'll see. He's willing to wait and do it right. When he finds love, it will be good. He won't marry just anyone and won't settle just to get married.

    You'll find her of these days.
    Im 19 lol.
    And maybe there is someone out there for me, but I really feel like there isn't at this point in my life
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #12

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:31 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 13sldr View Post
    Im 19 lol.
    and maybe there is someone out there for me, but I really feel like there isnt at this point in my life
    Nineteen... You havve so much to look forward too. Don't be in such a hurry. Enjoy being young.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #13

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:41 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 13sldr View Post
    Im 19 lol.
    and maybe there is someone out there for me, but I really feel like there isnt at this point in my life
    The woman my son is chatting with and might date soon makes monkey sock puppets as a hobby. He's setting up her web site so she can sell them online. Sounds like a meeting in a romance novel, right? I'm sure there is someone out there like that for you. And if you need a monkey sock puppet to give as a gift, maybe to a child, now you know where you can find one. Ask me.
    13sldr's Avatar
    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #14

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    The woman my son is chatting with and might date soon makes monkey sock puppets as a hobby. He's setting up her web site so she can sell them online. Sounds like a meeting in a romance novel, right? I'm sure there is someone out there like that for you. And if you need a monkey sock puppet to give as a gift, maybe to a child, now you know where you can find one. Ask me.
    Lol That is great to hear! And it would be great if there is something like that out there for me. It does sound like a novel, you should write it lol
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    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #15

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:54 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Kitkat22 View Post
    Nineteen...You havve so much to look forward too. Don't be in such a hurry. Enjoy being young.
    I know I am young
    But this is how I feel right now...
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #16

    Jul 4, 2010, 09:58 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 13sldr View Post
    lol That is great to hear! and it would be great if there is something like that out there for me. it does sound like a novel, you should write it lol
    I'm busy writing one about two people who meet again years later at their 50th high school reunion. She's scared to go and see him again (she knows he will be there) because she has a secret she never told him. She goes to the reunion and finds him and is dancing with him and he collapses. He has to be rushed to the hospital, and she goes along in the ambulance and holds his hand. They get to the hospital and the ER doctor... well I can't tell you any more, or I'll spoil the story.
    13sldr's Avatar
    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #17

    Jul 4, 2010, 10:03 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    I'm busy writing one about two people who meet again years later at their 50th high school reunion. She's scared to go and see him again (she knows he will be there) because she has a secret she never told him. She goes to the reunion and finds him and is dancing with him and he collapses. He has to be rushed to the hospital, and she goes along in the ambulance and holds his hand. They get to the hospital and the ER doctor ... well I can't tell you any more, or I'll spoil the story.

    Sounds great so far, are you going to get it published?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #18

    Jul 4, 2010, 10:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 13sldr View Post
    sounds great so far, are you going to get it published?
    What if I said I don't feel like God wants me to finish the book and get it published? What would you say to me?
    13sldr's Avatar
    13sldr Posts: 237, Reputation: 17
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    #19

    Jul 4, 2010, 10:43 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    What if I said I don't feel like God wants me to finish the book and get it published? What would you say to me?
    I see where you are going with this, and you have a point.
    I will not completely through any hope for true love out.

    Thank you guys for talking to me about this, has definitely helped out.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #20

    Jul 4, 2010, 10:58 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 13sldr View Post
    I see where you are going with this, and you have a point.
    I will not completely through any hope for true love out.
    I hadn't planned to go there, but it did seem like a similar situation. And since I've gotten four other books published, I'm thinking I might be able to get this one published too. Of course, I have to finish it... just like you have to find the right girl. Looks like we both have our work cut out for us!
    Thank you guys for talking to me about this, has definitely helped out.
    I'm glad. It was fun meeting you and talking with you. Don't stay away so long next time. When you find the right girl, check back to see if I got the book finished and published.

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