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    mary69's Avatar
    mary69 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 4, 2010, 03:56 PM
    How do I leave my husband with no money
    I am currently living in south america and my husband is an alcoholic that has started drinking again. I'm 40 he is 63. I'm desperate to go back to the states. I don't know where to start and I'm really scared. He has left me with no money and lots of bills. I need courage to leave and not feel like a loser. I am so ashamed my life is such a shambles at my age. I know I can work hard again and get back on my feet. The fear I have is if he will be explosive or if I need to figure out a way to leave while he takes a trip back home. I haven't been able to get the money from the sale of my goods back in home. So I can't even buy a ticket back. He keeps money away from me so I can't even save some behind his back. It will be $1000 -$1500 to get back because I won't leave my cat and little dog behind. I have no credit cards left since he stopped paying them. I have jewelry I can pawn when I get home as I won't get beans for it down here. I can't ask anyone I know to buy me a ticket and pay them back either. Help with any suggestions please. I am losing my hair and have migraines 24/7. I even managed to knock out two fillings from grinding my teeth. Please help me get out of this sinking ship. Thank you so much for listening.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
    		  
    #2

    Apr 4, 2010, 03:58 PM

    Are you a U.S. citizen?
    mary69's Avatar
    mary69 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Apr 4, 2010, 10:01 PM

    Yes I am a US citizen
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #4

    Apr 7, 2010, 04:14 PM

    Go to the US Embassy and ask for help.
    mary69's Avatar
    mary69 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Apr 11, 2010, 08:03 AM

    I would love to do that but it's 4hours away. I may have made some headway with my husband as far as going back to the US. He has tentativley agreed to send me back sometime in June. He is going back in May and will decide if he wants to stay in South America or move back to the US with me. Either way I am going home... Keep your fingers crossed. I still would give anything to be GONE GONE GONE TODAY! I feel that if I do this without running away it will be better in the long run. It might be the wake up call he needs to stop drinking. Which is now at a little more than half a liter a day of rum. I will not enable an alcoholic. He has tried to make feel guilty "I don't love him", "I don't want to be around him", "I lost so much sometimes I don't care if I never wake up" etc. It will be hard to wait it out but I will. I f you have any other suggestions of any kind please please please tell me I need courage to get through this. I just can't stop crying.
    Thank you for listening
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #6

    Apr 11, 2010, 08:24 AM

    Sorry, time to eat pride and do something if it is really that bad.

    You want someone else to do it for you, it appears. Sorry, for ourself we have to make some hard choices give animals to someone, and sneak money from him and hide it, call friends and borrow money from them.

    Make a choice to do it and just do it.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #7

    Apr 11, 2010, 08:45 AM

    There is no easy way. If the Embassy is 4 hours away, well, I guess you have to travel for 4 hours.

    If it's as bad as you say you need to stop crying and simply get out.

    No one here can help you beyond giving advice. You have to do the rest of the "work."
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