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blacksongbird · Mar 18, 2010, 11:42 AM

I have a quick question. My husband and I separated last year. Due to him acting like a clown and becoming violent he was arrested and evicted by the law. When we went to court, our attorneys (at the time) thought it'd be in his best interest to agree to a "stay away" agreement instead of a restraining order for employment purposes. During this meeting, our attorneys addressed custody, visitation rights, and child support. My biggest issue was and is that he lied to the attorneys to avoid giving me adequate child support for our children. The other thing that bothers me is that he barely exercises his visitation rights. He is allowed to see them twice a week for 4 hours each time. They only see him once a month and he rarely, if ever calls them.
A co-worker advised me to file child abandonment to have the child support increased but I'm not sure that I can do this given the circumstances. Any advice? It deeply disturbs me that a man would rather avoid taking care of his children to live a bachelor's life than being a good example of what a man and father are. Thanks.
Oh- I live in Fulton County, GA. Thanks again!

Fr_Chuck · Mar 18, 2010, 12:27 PM

Child visits and child support are not related, unless he left the kids at walmart and drove off he did not abandon them.

He is only responible to pay the child support that is court ordered, it is your job to prove he earns more money, if he is lying. Most people ( both sides) lie all the time on divorce and child custody, so that is normal

Child abandonment ( not charges) but is a reason to ask for a change in visitation, but that would be he not seeing the child at all in a year or two, not seeing once a month.

The Fulton county judges only review what info you provide them, so if you did not get or force him to provide copies of pay stubs and more that is on you ( really)

blacksongbird · Mar 18, 2010, 01:20 PM

Unfortunately, we didn't even stand before a judge. It was my fault for being so emotional on that day. I wasn't thinking rationally.
Several people have seen him working at the place he told the attorneys he did not work. He recently took the kids to the same job with his mom. I suppose he didn't think they'd tell me. Since we have the stay away agreement, how do you suggest I go about proving he works where he says he doesn't? I considered going there since he claims he doesn't work there but my mom said that might be treading on ice. I've also considered hiring a PI but that's expensive. Suggestions please. Thanks so much.

cdad · Mar 18, 2010, 02:40 PM

You have to understand that your story is thin at best. The fact that he wasn't working somewhere then doesn't mean he can't be working there now. There is no law against it unless it were to violate the stay away order. Also hiring a PI is like hiring a lawyer. They are well prepared with the documentation and can present it in court too. If your trying to prove something that isn't then you need to spend your money wisely.

ScottGem · Mar 18, 2010, 04:53 PM

In GA, they do call it child abandonment when a parent does not support their children. But what it really is is child support. If he is paying what the court ordered, then abandonment is not an issue, your co-worker doesn't what they are talking about. Since you have a support order, the only way you are going to get it changed is if you can prove that his income has increased sine the initial order.

You could file a subpoena on the business to provide payroll records, but I suspect that will get him fired. You can have someone call the business and ask for him. If he is brought to the phone or they take a message or something else that acknowledge he works there, you can have some proof to take to court.

blacksongbird · Mar 19, 2010, 06:49 AM

@ calidadof3- I've been hesitant to file because my claim is thin as you say. I know he works there. AND I knew he was working there when he said he wasn't. Even his best friend's wife has told me but I can't go to court on "hear say". I want and need hard evidence.
@ scottgem- I didn't think I could claim child abandonment. That didn't make sense in my head AT ALL! Lol Thanks for the suggestions. I thought about blocking my number and calling to pretend I was a bill collector. Lol Anything to see if someone will tell me anything.