Hi all...

I have a question about marriage and sex. I prefer sex at night, when we go to bed and my husband prefers it in the morning, when we wake up. I have a problem with it in the morning because sometimes (like this morning) a child is in our bed because of a bad dream, illness or whatever. Does anyone else have this problem? Does anyone have any ideas on what to do about our completely different desires? Honestly, I could try, but it does take a lot more work for me to get going. It's like have to totally clear my mind before I can truly enjoy the situation. We are both a little frustrated.

Thanks for any advice you can offer.

I prefer spare of the moment ;)
But I don't have kids so that makes a difference but if I had to make a choice in the mornin for some bizarre reason sex gives a nicer sensation but then again there's always the mornin breath that isn't so nice lol, but I like at night to because it's a nice ending to go to bed.

it's a challenge.

I'm a late night person. Wife is morning person. It can be tough. For the most part, I have to compromise. By the end of the night she's exhausted (up since 5am). We also have a little one (3 yr old) that can ruin any morning fun... if anything, you are always tense about the child waking up even if he doesn't, which distracts from the moment. Id like to makeout a little more, and morning just isn't a sexy time in my opinion.

so we haven't found a great compromise, other than I tend to go her direction more than she goes mine. Sex at 5am is better than nothing. I've had nothing before. I use to scoff at early morning sex. Call me a broken man, or a smarter one. My father-in-law used to say the worst sex he ever had was great... meaning I guess 5am morning breath, squinty eyed, haven't had my coffee yet sex is still fun. =) there, have I really ruined it for you?

I jokingly asked her last week if we pay a babysitter to come watch the kid and then we go somewhere and have sex, is that wrong? She quickly said no. =) his grandmother used to take him twice a week, once on the weekend and once during the week, and wed almost always use some of that time to be intimate... sometimes joke between us that grandma didn't even have to leave, she could just walk him up and down the block a few times. =)

so... I guess I don't have an answer for you. My wife's job takes a lot out of her, and her natural rhythm is just opposite mine. The one thing we've done is promise to take an overnight every month or so... we get someone to watch the boy overnight and we grab a hotel room after a date. Its great.

it's a little silly, as the hotel is like 15 minutes away from our house. But it lets us relax and really enjoy each others time, and still not be so far away that if there was an emergency we could get there if needed.

in between those nights, its just do as you can.

You'll think its strange, but my fiancée and I have been getting the grandma over to watch our son who is three... Will actually go to the strip club, grab a few drinks-watch stuff shake for us, grab a hotel and the night usually goes pretty well... just another option...
If your women likes to see other women... this will definitely spice it up
But remember to always be respectful to your woman... no matter how fine or big and thick the dancer is... lol

Don't to anything for a month and your husband will need sex and he will agry to sexing at night. OK

Don't do anything for a month and your husband will need sex and than he will be agry to sexing with you at night or in the morning!!

Thank you so far. I think I have concluded that we may need more alone time. I suppose it doesn't have to be just in the morning or the evening. Maybe when he is home during the day, I should make a point of innitiating. Maybe I could even wake up earlier too. I hate getting up early, but maybe I could compromise. Thanks all.

I agree bad sex is still good sex! I like that idea... thanks kp.

Maybe yous guys ought to bite the bullet and go for a "nooner"! :eek: :p

Compromise is always best Sorrow!

well, the only issue I think he needs to understand is the issue of giving you time... as in time to lose yourself in the moment, and that probably means sometimes at night he's just going to have to be a nice guy and see things your way.

that is, if you have to wake yourself up in the dim hours of the morn because he won't show you some attention at night, then hed probably better be willing to do the work to get you interested in the morning. Hopefully hell be gracious and giving, and if you guys can make it a really early morning thing, you can get a nap in after. =) actually, as much as I'm a late night person, I've found that when my partner and I fool around ugly early, as in closer to, like 4-5am versus 7am, I'm actually more awake in those early morning hours.

and I would be frank with him... let him know you are interested in meeting his needs and willing to try to work with him on times, but that you are also going to need your needs met... as in time spent on you. If you can't get your mind into it, you know you're just going through the motions. Which, again, isn't bad, but not enough.

the bad thing about my wife being an early morning person is occasionally well be having fun and then I can just see that she's starting to think about the day in front of her, at which point its pretty much over for her. Oh well. Time to go make the coffee. =P

Thanks again kp. My husband is more than willing to make sure I get my "cookie" too... everytime. However, I don't like how it can take so long, I don't like worrying about my breath or any of the other little hang-ups I have about myself. I think that if I could let go of some of those things maybe it wouldn't take me so long to get going in the morning. I think he is just much more ready for it than I am. I am trying. Thanks.

Wow.. that's a tough one. Not that I have a choice (or that I would turn it down if it wasn't when I wanted it) but I typically enjoy it more in the morning. Usually, our nights are long as it is an we may not get into bed until 3-3:30 (both of us also working at bars). So I find myslef quite exhausted at that point. The mornings, I am refreshed and awake and ready to go. However, that morning breathe issue (as someone mentioned) puts a small damper on it. The nooner is always nice, as is the mid-morninger, the afternooner, the early eveninger, the later eveninger, the midnight snack, etc... lol

For morning breath, it is OK, to get up, go to the bathroom and brush your teeth and jump back in bed,

Or a pack of breath mints on the bed table is not a bad thing either.

oh, and my other fav saying about trying to find time to make time with kids in the house.

even false hope is still hope.

=)

LOL... that 's good kp2171.

Sometimes that's all I have. I will have to work on putting the kids and everything out of my mind. It seems like my brain never gets a rest. I dream all night and think think think all day. Anyway... back to the topic, thanks for all the advice, I will continue to work on this. I am glad to hear that I am not so abnormal. Thanks.

Honest reply - do it both times :)

Sex in night is right way but at morning more pleasant

I prefer either early (I mean not in late night)or early in the morning try to flow as the same way as river(husband)trust me you will enjoy

Sex is one filling
That is not particular time
When u have desire any time u can do it
And don't press your desire

I think that you should try sex in the morning and at night and see which one you like better. Personally I like sex at morning and night.